How To Talk About Your PTSD

Healthyplace.com

How to talk about your posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is tricky, isn’t it? I know during my recovery I found it very difficult to talk about my trauma and/or PTSD experience. I was uncomfortable dredging up the memories, sharing my fears, and even admitting my shame, embarrassment, and other issues. But PTSD thrives and grows in the silence the way mold grows in dark and moist places. Healing means letting in the sun and it starts with learning how to talk about your PTSD.
Learning How To Talk About Your PTSD

During my PTSD recovery, the last thing I wanted to do was talk about my trauma, my survival, my PTSD (or anything else for that matter). What I did want to do was crawl into my shell and never speak again.

The reason for my silence was that my trauma caused me to feel overwhelmed by emotion, so it was better to shut down than “share” or “express.” I also didn’t have the words to explain my experience or what I was feeling. I couldn’t, wouldn’t and didn’t talk about any of it — for 29 years. And then PTSD brought me to my knees. That’s when I found poetry. Finally, I discovered a way to begin putting into words what was literally threatening to kill me. It was because I found words that I eventually found help.

It’s true, struggling with symptoms of posttraumatic stress can make language hard to grasp, but it isn’t true that we can’t do it. Putting pain into words can help contain, relieve and lessen it. Communicating is the crux of surviving survival. Be brave. Start finding a way to learn how to talk about your PTSD.

Starting to Talk About Your PTSD

In order to get the help you need, it’s imperative you begin to wrangle language. So often we don’t talk because we don’t know what to say or how to say it. But think about this: actors rehearse. They have important lines to get out and they memorize them so they get the playwright’s intention perfect. You can do the same. I know you’re capable of talking, you just haven’t yet figured out how. Today, start figuring it out:

Pretend you’re the lead in a very dramatic play. Your role: “Survivor” and in this scene you need to explain to another character what it feels like to be you.

This will be a monologue. Write it out. And then memorize the key points. In the flood of emotion (that will surely come until you get used to telling the many different facets of your story) it can help to have a script. Read it over and over. Get familiar with it. Feel how the words roll around in your mouth. Listen to the sound of your own voice.

If you don’t want to memorize the script, then practice and take the page(s) with you to an appointment or to meet a friend. Read them out loud to someone. Words are the key to your freedom. Start getting comfortable with them.

Learning how to talk about your PTSD takes time, but when you find the right person, place, time and way to do it the rewards can be enormous, even opening a new door to healing that begins to provide enormous relief.

“The Secret Of Change Is To Focus All Your Energy, Not On Fighting The Old, But On Building The New”.

8 Depression Rehab Tips – That Can Work For Anyone


Powerofpositivity.com

Right now, more people suffer from clinical depression and are attending depression rehab than ever before, but that doesn’t mean you can’t reverse it with small, actionable steps. While depression does have a tendency to get passed down through genes, it largely results from the thought patterns you have over a long period of time. What you think about regularly, you become. 

By doing things that make you feel good and cultivating a positive mindset, you can more easily handle depression and learn what triggers it. If you have been trying to begin rebuilding a life you love, please take these depression rehab tips into consideration so you can get back on a path to living a happy, healthy life.

Here are 8 Depression Rehab Tips That Can Work for Anyone:

1.Cultivate a loving relationship with yourself.

Any discomfort or distress always originates within ourselves, which means good feelings start within us, too! How you see the world mirrors how you see yourself, so by learning to love yourself, you can love the world. It doesn’t matter where you live, what job you have, if you have friends or not, or how much you make…if you love yourself and feel happy within, you have unlocked the key to true satisfaction.

Say this phrase over and over again every single day when you feel your mind going down a negative path: “I love myself.” Feel how these words change your outlook on life and even how you feel in your body. Then, you will inevitably start making loving choices like eating well, exercising, seeking positive relationships, and working at a job you love. Everything begins with how you treat yourself and what you think about yourself.

Choose love, because you don’t deserve anything less than that.

2. Spend time in nature at least thirty minutes a day.

It’s impossible to spend time in the sun and not feel those happy vibes radiate through your body. Even if you don’t live in a particularly sunny area, just feeling the wind on your face or breathing in fresh air from trees can help tremendously in treating depression. Most people don’t get have any sort of relationship with nature, which explains why most of us feel so disconnected from ourselves and each other.

Maybe you could take your lunch break outdoors instead of sitting in the break room at work – get into nature whenever you can; it works wonders in creating peace within the mind and body.

3. Channel negative energy into something positive.

Any time you start to feel your thoughts, or other people’s thoughts, drag you down, immediately think of something positive to do or say. If your friend had a bad day, ask him or her what made them smile that day. If you had a bad day, go do something that feels good. Go ride your bike, call a supportive friend, write in your journal, play a song that makes you happy…just do anything but wallow in negative energy.

Everything around us and within us is energy, we just have to learn how to direct it in order to live, not just exist.

4. Join groups or clubs in the area that promote positive thinking.

If you suffer from depression, surrounding yourself with inspiring people can slowly start to change your outlook. Also, doing activities you truly love will take your mind off of your mind, so to speak, and help you cultivate happiness again. Even if you don’t feel like socializing, talking with other positive people will stimulate your brain and help retrain it to think differently.

You can find several websites that cater to people looking for groups or clubs to join in their city, and a lot of these meet ups don’t cost anything to take part in.

5. Ask yourself if you would treat others how you treat yourself.

Would you tell a friend what you tell yourself on a daily basis? If not, why do you treat yourself this way?

If you wouldn’t tell someone else that they’re ugly, don’t say it to yourself. If you wouldn’t buy chemical-laced fast foods for your friend for dinner, why do you frequent those places? If you wouldn’t say to your friend “You’re not good enough,” why do you make it a habit of reinforcing that thought within yourself?

Pay attention to everything you say and do to yourself, and start asking yourself if you would replicate those thoughts and actions toward others.

6. Stop chasing perfection.

Depression usually stems from our belief that we just don’t measure up compared to others. That’s just it – you shouldn’t compare yourself to others, because they have their own unique path to follow. You have yours as well, so the only person you need to compare yourself to is who you were yesterday. Even if you don’t feel better than yesterday, don’t beat yourself up. Depression takes time to heal from, and it takes time to rewire your stream of thoughts.

Accept yourself now, as you are, and go from there. Accept yourself in every moment, and allow yourself to live and make mistakes. You’ll feel a lot more freedom in letting go than you will when you try to put yourself in a box of everything you think you need to be to love yourself.

7. Simplify your life.

Minimize stress by getting rid of anything superfluous that no longer serves you. This can include toxic relationships, clothing and gadgets in your house you don’t wear or use, your old car that constantly requires repairs, your job that makes you feel miserable, and anything else that causes you anxiety.

Shape your life into something that reflects you and your interests, and eliminate what doesn’t. Most of the time, we put unnecessary stress on ourselves, so choose to end that habit today. Maximize your happiness by reducing your worries.

8. Volunteer.

Perhaps one of the most powerful methods for overcoming depression is helping someone else. When you give to people less fortunate, or just lend a helping hand or your heart to someone, you will instantly elevate your mood. This instills a sense of purpose and value within you, because you have enhanced someone else’s life. You gave your time and effort to something outside yourself, and chose to focus on making others feel good.

Sometimes, the best way to stop negative thinking is just to stop thinking about ourselves. So, get involved with your community. Or just rake your neighbor’s leaves or mow their lawn. Do something to make someone’s life better, and you will most certainly feel better yourself.




We’re All In The Same Game; Just Different Levels, Dealing With The Same Hell; Just Different Devils

Living With Personality Disorder – One Day At A Time

By Marwa – time-to-change.org.uk.                                  Real Lives

Last summer, my boyfriend dumped me. It was a serious relationship and we were about to get married. It wasn’t a healthy relationship. I used him as my crutch. I told myself ‘as long as I have him, I’ll be fine.’ I knew that there was a possibility he could leave and not necessarily by choice e.g. a tragic accident could befall him. I knew that when he left, I wouldn’t be able to cope but I didn’t do anything about it. This proved to be a serious mistake.

In hospital I met people who understood what it felt like to struggle with mental health issues

I became really unwell. I spent two short periods in psychiatric hospital. I came into contact with emergency services so many times that I lost count; it was like I lived in the assessment suite at my local mental hospital at one point. This is because I kept harming myself or, in their words, I kept acting ‘mentally disordered’ in a public place. The emergency staff weren’t always nice, especially some of the police officers. I was an informal patient during both my stays in mental hospital.

What was nice though was being surrounded by people who understood what it felt like to struggle with mental health issues. I met so many people who were diagnosed with various disorders including the ones I suffer from: emotionally unstable personality disorder (EUPD) and depression. I met other people who were suicidal, unable to cope with life, unable to cope with emotions etc. We were like a family. We all looked out for each other generally. I finally felt like I fitted in somewhere. In particular, I remember one woman who had this really dark sense of humour, which I think most people would not get but I got it. This is because she had EUPD like me and I struggled with the same symptoms as her. I did feel a bit triggered sometimes but, for the most part, it was all right. Hospital kept me safe and that was what I needed.

My family just did not ‘get’ my illness

Prior to this, my life was simply unstable. I’d get hurt by the smallest things. I’d start thinking of ending my life over the silliest things. The world was full of triggers for me and I think my main triggers were people. It seemed everything people said and did triggered me. They simply could do nothing right. Coming from a Somali and Muslim background, my family just did not get it.

My turning point in my life was getting arrested for a minor offence for something I did when I was unwell. Even in my custody notes, the social worker said my behaviour was ‘probably due to my emotionally unstable personality disorder.’ I did lodge a complaint against the police for arresting me even though I was unwell and I did the ‘crime’ simply because of that but they explained to me that their hands were tied and that they had to keep me safe. It was a turning point because prior to this, I had never been arrested before. I had always been a law-abiding citizen. I just never imagined that I’d be worrying about having a criminal record. In the end, after contacting the police, I was informed that my record was still clean, thankfully.

Take each day at a time 

Things are stable now. That’s all I can say. I am not going to say I am happy because I am not. I am not going to say all my problems have been solved because they haven’t. I recently started mentalisation based therapy. I also volunteer with a homelessness organisation in London. I’ve dabbled in some other voluntary work here and there too. And currently, I am looking for part time work with a mental health charity.

What has helped me significantly are the following things:

Medication

Religion- I am a practising Muslim.

Volunteering – I simply love volunteering. No matter what I am going through, I still have shelter and food in my stomach. Helping homeless people reminds me of this! I also love the people I work with. (Sshhh, don’t tell them!)

Support network – I have a family and a few friends.

My top tip is to take each day at a time. Do not dwell on the past or worry too much about the future. Yesterday has gone and therefore can’t be undone, and tomorrow is not even guaranteed!




Bad Mood??….. Not For Long

Here’s Some Tips To Pull You Out Of It 


1) Even If You Can’t Be Arsed – Make Yourself Make The Effort To Change How You’re 
Feeling. 

2) Go For A Walk, The Freshair And Exercise Will Instantly Make You Feel Better.

3) Smile And Say Hello To The People You Walk By, It May Be Fake At First, But It Won’t Be For Long As You Will Start To Get A Good Feeling In No Time.

4) Watch A Film Or Program, Listen To Some Upbeat Music.
 Something You Know You’ll Enjoy.

5) Do A Random Act Of Kindness, Like Helping Someone With Their Bags, Or Getting The Door For Someone Who Maybe Struggling, This Will Not Only Improve Your Mood But Will Increase Your Self Esteem Aswell.

6) Lastly, If All Else Fails…Be Silly, Make Yourself Laugh, Wack The Music Up And Dance Like An Idiot.

Make Progress – Depression..Addiction..Bipolar

FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP FOR ANYONE WHO SUFFERS FROM ANY TYPE OF MENTAL ILLNESS

Hi I’m Anna And This Is My WordPress Page And I Also Created & Run A Facebook Support Group…For Anyone Who Suffers With Any Form Of Mental Illness

Make Progress Group Is A Secret Group And We Have A Community Of Approximately 540…

Unlike A Lot Of Groups That Are Really Busy With A Huge Amount Of Members…I Never Wanted That… We Have Worked And Pride Ourselves On Giving That Member Who Needs Us Our Full Attention And Endevour To Answer Every Post As Quickly As Possible. The Personal Touch Is Very Important.
If You Didn’t Feel Comfortable To Post Straight Away…That’s Absolutely Fine…Reading The Board May Still Benefit You With Other Posts And Comments Aswell As Various Blogs…Articles Etc I Post.

As A Group We Also Do 121 Support, That Is When A Member And Admin Have Private Messaging… It Is More Private & Allows The Member To Open Up More.

If You Feel That A Small Group Like Ours Will Benefit You Please Get In Touch You Will Very Welcome xx

Ways To Overcome Lonliness

“You Cannot Be Lonely If You Like The Person You’re Alone With” ~ Wayne Dyer

Reach Out… 

You need to feel a common bond with people and a way of doing this is to think about what you’re interested in and join local groups. Connecting with like minded people could turn out to be the best decision you have made for both your mental and emotional health…so don’t hesitate.

Learn To Love Yourself

Before you can appreciate the company of others you need to learn to enjoy your own, you must learn to totally love yourself otherwise others can’t offer you the same sentiment. If you don’t learn to love yourself you continue to feel lonely even in a room of a hundred people. You must heal your wounds from the inside and once your fully in tune with yourself you will be able to connect much easier.

Talk To New People

Easier said than done but try striking up a conversation when you’re stood at the bus stop waiting for the bus, or in the super market – you have chances to connect with someone almost anywhere you go.

Focus Your Attention On Things Other Than What You’re Feeling

Helping others is a great way to connect. By helping others you will also be helping yourself, by doing this it will make you instantly forget about the loneliness you have been feeling, it will also connect to people. Have a look online for volunteering in your area.

General Activities

You don’t have to just join a group to meet others, you can meet them anywhere whilst doing general activity…In the gym, whilst walking the dogs, out running or even if you were travelling. You can meet people anywhere. So release your fears and open yourself up a bit.

You CAN overcome loneliness, all it takes is the willingness and commitment to reach out and open your heart.

Anna Laidlaw

7 Ways To Manage Your Anxiety


“People tend to dwell on negative things than on good things.
So the mind becomes obsessed with negative thoughts, with judgements, guilt and anxiety produced by thoughts about the future and so on”.                             

  ~ Eckhart Tolle – Author of The Power Now 


The American Psychological Association (APA) defines anxiety as “an emotion characterised by feelings of tension, worried thoughts and physical changes like increased blood pressure”

Pretty much all of us can resonate with having had a bout of anxiety… maybe even within the last 24 hours.

Anxiety is incredibly common; especially in this crazy, tuned-in (but not really), smartphone carrying, ultra-competitive society that we find ourselves in. To be perfectly clear, having occasional anxiety is completely normal. All of us get overwhelmed from time to time, with the demands and stressors of life an almost daily occurrence.


Here Are 7 Effective, Practical Ways To Deal With Anxiety
In Your Life: 

1. Remember… Anxiety Is Impulsive.

Sometimes our brain works in mysterious ways. Actually, make that most of the time. Impulsivity is something that we are all subject to from time to time…and it’s automatic.

Our brains have a “fight or flight” mechanism, attributed to evolutionary changes in the brain responsible for controlling how the body functions in an emergency. Here is a brilliant analogy that was found when scouring the web…

While drinking your second cup of coffee at work, you hear your boss say “Could I see you in my office?” Upon hearing these words, the hypothalamus of your brain messages your adrenal glands and within seconds your body is summoning all of the same powers that your cavemen ancestors needed when encountering a wild animal.

As you enter the bosses’ office, you are now experiencing a full-fledged fight or flight response. You know that you can’t flee, so instead all that energy is just builds up inside until you feel like you’re ready to explode. Then, your boss looks your straight in the eye…”We’re considering you for a promotion.”


2. Remind Yourself That Anxious Feelings Are Temporary

As with nearly everything else, anxiety comes and goes. The reason for this is simple: our body, mind, and life experiences are constantly changing. As such, our brains must constantly change and adapt.

Uncertainty is without a doubt the most powerful and common precursor of anxiety. When we feel out of control in any way, we are almost always going to experience an anxious response. When you’re feeling overwhelmed or out of control, remember that these feelings are temporary. “This too shall pass…”

And then? Well, it begins to go away…


 3. Get Active.

Exercise is probably the best antidote to anxiety. It doesn’t matter what kind of exercise– bike, hike, swim, run, shoot hoops – do whatever as long as the heart is pumping as a good rate. Simply put: exercise boosts our mood. Interestingly, exercise of any form has been shown to be as effective (if not more so) than antidepressants. Not only does exercise boost your mood, the exposure to fresh clean air and sunshine can quickly brighten your mood.

In a book called “The Depression Cure”, clinical psychologist states: “Exercise changes the brain. It increases the activity level of important brain chemicals such as dopamine and serotonin…(it) also increases the brain’s production of a key growth hormone that normally plummets in depression…some parts of the brain start to shrink over time, and learning and memory are impaired…exercise reduces this trend, protecting the brain in a way nothing else can.”


4. Treat Yourself Well.

When we are not feeling well, our innate response is to rest; maybe even make ourselves a hot cup of tea and try to get some sleep. This response is almost automatic…we’ve been “trained” to do this when we don’t feel well.

When we feel anxious, we don’t feel well. The only difference is that we need to be more proactive about how we treat ourselves because we have more control over how we respond, unlike most physical illness.

So, be proactive by meditating, reading something inspiring, getting some rest, getting outdoors…whatever brings feelings of joy and peace, do it.


 5. Focus On Your Breath.

Depending on where and when our anxious feelings occur, we may be limited in how they’re dealt with. If in a cubicle at work or in a crowded public area, bringing attention to your breath is a great way to help ease anxiety.

Bring focus to the breath for a few moments – put one hand on the abdominal area and another on the chest while trying to make the abdominal area move more. The reason: when we are anxious we have a tendency to breathe in a more shallow fashion (with more chest movement).

Make a conscious effort to fill up the abdominal/diaphragm/belly area with deep, mindful inhalations. Then slowly exhale while feeling the anxiety fleeing. Take a deep breath in for 4 seconds, and slowly exhale over an 8 second count. Or focus only on your breath for 60 seconds while attempting to think of nothing else.

Proper oxygen sent to the brain can immediately bring a sense of reason back into your mind, allowing your anxiety to diminish.


6. Understand The Human Brain.

This is another way of reminding us that we are not our brains. This fact cannot be reiterated enough; yet it is often overlooked, or unknown by many.

Neuroscientists, psychologists and psychiatrists all say the same thing… we have the emotional, primitive parts of our brain (the ‘amygdala’) that is responsible for the generation and processing of primal emotions (fear, worry), and the logical parts – the frontal lobes and cortex which are educated, sophisticated, and reasoning.

In layman’s terms – we have both the drama queen from the local community theatre and the distinguished, intellectual Harvard professor telling us what to do.


7. Distract Yourself.

We may have the most complex, advanced brains in the animal kingdom but that doesn’t mean that we aren’t susceptible to a nice, juicy distraction every now and then.

When anxiety is rampant, we want to get out of our own heads as much as possible. It really doesn’t matter how it’s done – a movie, game, book, magazine, puzzle, etc. – as long as it gets the mind to focus onto something else.



Powerofpositivity.com

Self Harm Can Be The Dark Passenger With Depression

********TRIGGER WARNING********

Huffington Post

Depression in its essence is a very difficult illness to describe at times. It can be hard to convey the complexity of what I suffer each day in a way which is not only helpful but also clear. When your mind is similar to an internal inferno, with thoughts in traumatic relentlessness, clarity is tough. With this in mind, it becomes an even greater struggle to explain self harm and why I would even consider it, yet do it. It is a dark passenger that takes the wheel every now and then. It is destructive physically and contributes to mental struggles. It is also a paradox because of the apparent relief it momentarily provides.

It’s an obvious question: how could hurting yourself provide any relief? Unfortunately I am seasoned to self-harm and its effects. I honestly wish I could be writing this with no scars from the times I hurt myself but I am scarred. I wish I lived without the urges but I occasionally yearn for the pain. It is something which can be hypnotic and hurtful not only to me but to those who love me. To see someone in pain is, in turn, painful; to see someone in pain because they inflicted it on themselves is heartbreaking.

As hard as it is to confront, it is a very real effect of depression at times. I deliberately use the word effect because self harm is not necessarily something I have done out of choice but rather a symptom of my illness. I know I technically have a choice not to pick up a knife but when I have been so consumed by the swirling sneers in my head I have been compelled to cut myself. When I have felt so numb that nothing around me provides any emotion I have been desperate to feel.

It is terrifying how common it can be to feel utterly numb to everything around me. It’s like living inside the world with headphones and sunglasses on; everything is duller in colour and in sound. Reality has become something Other and I feel disconnected. I have sat at home and wondered if I will feel anything significant again; I have been scared that numbness will be normal. Self harm enters the arena as a means to feel something significant, even if that is pain. It feels shameful and stupid but for a fleeting moment it feels of something.

The help and professional guidance I have is equipping me to walk a different path that engages me with reality without the detrimental effects to my health. Feeling comes through so many wonderful forms; it’s important that I connect with those. It’s also important that I don’t use self harm as a means to punish myself because by punishing myself I am also punishing those around me who love and care for me. The thunderous effect depression has on people and those friends and family involved is monstrous, which is why I desire healing, recovery and wholeness. It’s a painful path but I want to be a person of light and laughter to others and I know I can be.

It’s a really difficult area of mental illness to comprehend but, from experience, I know that it does not imply someone doing it is any less of a person. It saddens me that I have hurt myself but it inspires me that people have stuck by me regardless. They have sat with me, comforted me and cared for me and I am truly thankful for their life saving support. When I have hurt myself I have seen the pain in loved ones’ eyes because I would do that and my goal and aim is to see love and happiness in their eyes instead.